MARIETTA S01E04, THE DEMOCRATIC AGENDA:
Marietta is in her Senate office when she gets a call from Milton.
Marietta: What do you want Milton?
Milton: Well, aren’t you chipper today?
Marietta: I haven’t slept right in like a week. We’re trying to pass some bills before the end of the term and Tim Cortez was filibustering and we couldn’t stop him and now Kate Hagelin has the floor and she loves to yap and this is hell. Like, actual hell. Anyway, mom said I should get some sleep but….
Milton: Marietta, are you still there?
Marietta: Yup, still here. I just fell asleep for a few seconds there. But I’m here.
Milton: Just go to sleep.
Marietta: I think that’s a good idea.
Milton: Well bye. Get some rest, your health is more important than some bills.
Marietta: Bye mom!
Milton rolls his eyes at Marietta’s rudeness and hangs up the phone.
Marietta: Alright, now to go pass some laws before I call it quits. And then don’t call it quits because politics is my drug.
Tammy walks by Marietta’s office and hears her conversation with herself.
Tammy: Who are you talking to?
Marietta: Nobody. Just me, myself, and I.
Tammy: Oh. Totally normal thing to do. I’m sure you’re not overtired or anything.
Marietta: You sound like my mother. And Milton. I’m fine, I just need some coffee and maybe some cocaine.
Marietta: I was just joking!
Tammy: Well, if you excuse me, I have actual work to do. I have to go shopping. You better take a damn nap.
The Senate Democrats are working to pass as many bills as possible before they lose their Senate majority. Marietta walks out to “help” during her friend’s heartfelt floor speech.
Kate Hagelin: I want to speak from my heart right now. I usually don’t speak about my family’s origins in the US, but I feel this is a relevant topic. Eighty years ago, my grandparents brought my mother, who was then just an infant, to this country from Cuba. They came here as illegal immigrants, and were afraid of being deported. It took years for them to work up the courage to become citizens a Some twenty years later, they became citizens of this great country, well after my mother became a citizen. I was born three years later. I stan-
Marietta: What’s going on here? Let’s just vote so I can go to sleep!!!
Kate: I’m glad the story of my family matters so much to you. I’m touched.
Marietta: Well this is the fifth bill we’ll be voting on today out of ten, and y’all are yapping so much that I just don’t see how we can pass them.
Kate: Well we want to give everyone a chance to be heard.
Marietta: It’s an immigration bill. Us Democrats are for it. The Republicans aren’t. There, I saved you time.
Kate: Y’know, you can really be irritating when you want to be.
Marietta: Oh, I see how it is. I speak the truth and I’m “irritating”.
Kate: Yes. You are. Mr. President, let’s just begin voting.
VP Freeman: The yeas and nays have been ordered. The clerk will now call the roll.
Seemingly Ten Hours Passes
Clerk: Mrs. Landfield
Marietta: No. Oh, shoot! I meant Yes! I vote yes.
Clerk: So that’s a no, then?
Marietta: No, it’s a yes! I vote yes!!!
Clerk: Just some clerk humor, Mrs. Landfield.
Marietta: Oh, that sure is funny.
Tammy rushes into the chamber in a frenzy.
Tammy: I hope I’m not too late! I was just in a Kohl’s in Virginia!
Marietta: I’m glad you’ve got your priorities straight, Tammy. I almost voted no on this bill because I forgot which bill we were voting on.
Tammy: That’s a very Marietta thing to do.
Marietta: Thank you…?
Tammy: Not really a compliment!
Clerk: Mrs. Yarborough
Tammy: I’m a yes on this. Also, here’s a gift basket filled with muffins for you to enjoy. Have a lovely day, Diane!
Diane: You too, Senator Yarborough!
Marietta: Wow, what came over you, Tammy? Are you nice all of the sudden?
Tammy: Only to those that deserve it. Now if you excuse me, I have to get to a Target in Bethesda.
Marietta: I’ll make sure to warn them!
Tammy: Very funny. Now I really have to go! Bye!
Marietta: Bye Tammy.
Tammy dashes out the door into her car.
Tammy: Alright, I’ve got three hours to get to Target, get gifts for twenty people, and get back here. Think we can do it, Pierre?
Pierre, Tammy’s chauffeur, nods his head.
Tammy: Alright, let’s go. I’ve already got some ideas. I’m gonna get Victo-
Pierre rolls up the window so he can no longer hear Tammy.
Tammy: Well that’s just lovely. Guess I’ll take a nap for the next half hour.
30 minutes later, the car pulls arrives at the store.
Tammy: Oh my, it’s time already? Well, I guess I’ll head in. Pierre, be back in two hours!
Meanwhile, back at the Senate, voting on the immigration bill has finally ended and the senators are ready to move on.
Marietta: So Kate, what’s next?
Kate: Well, Marjorie wanted
Marietta: Ah, yes. Marjorie! Your new fearless leader.
Kate: She’s not as much fearless as she is “available.”
WRITTEN BY: Rebecca Bunch
CREATED BY: Rebecca Bunch
PRODUCED BY: Rebecca Bunch, TVRGO